


So You Want to Be a Power Ranger

by TheSecondBatgirl



Category: Mighty Morphin Power Rangers, Power Rangers Dino Thunder, Power Rangers Samurai, Power Rangers in Space
Genre: Gen, ranger reunion
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-09
Updated: 2013-01-09
Packaged: 2017-11-24 07:23:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/631892
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheSecondBatgirl/pseuds/TheSecondBatgirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Why you shouldn't annoy your tech, what to do when your long-lost sibling turns out to be a villain, and more advice that the Power Rangers pass on to their new teams.</p>
            </blockquote>





	So You Want to Be a Power Ranger

**Author's Note:**

> This originally started as a joint project with psyco_chick32, and approximately half of the chapter list at the end are her contributions.

“And that’s why you should always keep a close eye on Red Rangers, or anyone named Tommy Oliver,” Kimberly finished with a dramatic flair.

Kira snorted. “How many Zords has he blown up?” she asked.

“I don’t even count anymore,” Kim said. “It’s a Red Ranger thing - most of them don’t know when it’s time to make a strategic retreat, and then Zords blow up. I mean, usually the tech is around to help, or you go on some sort of wacky quest in a desert to find new powers, but still!”

“Not all Reds are like that!” one of the many Rangers called. Kira was having trouble keeping track. At least everyone at the reunion was color coded so she could figure out what color they were, even if she didn’t know their names or what team they were on.

“Okay, fine,” Kim agreed. “Then there are the Rookies, but they’re also likely to blow stuff up. Or the Reds that need to be put on a leash because they’re always running off to deal with their own issues or problem of the week.”

There was a snort from behind her, and Ashley had joined them. At least Kira could recognize her - she did know most of the public identity Rangers, and she’d been threatened with a quiz later on the names and teams of all the Yellow Rangers. “Are you specifically talking about Andros there, or did you have someone else in mind?”

“Not just Andros,” Kim assured her. “Jason did the same thing whenever someone said Goldar.”

“Hey!” a few voices called, and Kira realized that they had gotten a fairly big audience.

“You should make a list of things to know when you become a Ranger,” she said suddenly. “I mean, there’s nearly a dozen teams now - between all of us I’m sure we could come up with a guide for the new teams.”

Kim laughed. “Sure!” she said. “Let’s see... chapter one - what sort of Red Ranger do you have? Take a quiz and find the appropriate coping mechanisms.”

“Chapter two, whatever you do, don’t piss off your tech or we won’t give you any new toys,” Hayley called from her seat where she was curled up with a bunch of Blue Rangers and techs.

“And don’t piss off a yellow!” Aisha shouted, which got groans from some people and cheers from others.

*

“What’s this?” Emily asked curiously, as she poked at the package that had shown up the day after the Samurai team had assembled at the Shiba house.

Jayden ripped off the packaging. “So You Want to Be a Power Ranger?” he read. He opened to the table of contents. “Knowing your Red Ranger,” he said slowly.

“We already know you, Jayden,” Emily assured him, and he managed to smile at her.

“What else is in there?” Mia asked.

Jayden took a look. “Something about being scared of Yellow Rangers.”

Mike snorted. “They haven’t met Emily, yet. She’s too sweet to be scary.”

“Thanks, Mike!” Emily said brightly.

“Tommy Oliver’s guide to surviving being a Power Ranger with your sanity intact, that could be useful.” Jayden started to flip to that chapter, when the next one caught his eye. “Or maybe not.”

Mike pulled the book out of his hands. “Times to listen to your mentor, and times to ignore him. That could be useful.”

“Give me that,” Mentor Ji said, reaching for the book, but Mike kept reading.

“Impractical uniform choices,” he said. “Man, whoever wrote this is great.” He flipped to the page. “One of the other teams had capes? Nice.”

“Give me the book, Mike!” Kevin said.

Mike flipped to another page. “You shouldn’t argue with me, Kevin! The book says that if you do, it will only end with you going evil and getting glowy eyes.”

“I would never go evil,” Kevin protested.

“That’s what you say _now_ ,” Mike said.

“Mike,” Jayden said firmly. Mike hesitated, but handed over the book.

Jayden glanced over the title list, and stopped when he saw a chapter about how your teammates could understand your pain. He wasn’t sure about that one. It wasn’t something he could share with his new team anyway.

“Jayden?” Mia asked in concern.

“I was just amused by a chapter on Ninja Turtles,” he said finally.

“Cool!” Mike said. “We’ll have to read that later.”

“Of course,” Jayden said. “But for now, we have to train.”

He closed the book and put it on the shelf.

*

The war was over. It had been over for a few days, and Jayden had been spending his time relaxing with Ji, and trying to deal with how his team had scattered across the globe.

“Hey,” Lauren called. “I’m back.”

He lit up when he saw his sister. “Welcome back,” he said.

“Sorry I couldn’t stay before,” she told him, as she dropped the rest of her luggage. “I am really bad at goodbyes, and I needed to go pack up my apartment anyway so I could move back here.”

“It’s cool,” Jayden said. “Ji’s been teaching me to play the guitar while you were gone - something about how I needed to learn to relax and accept that the war is over. But he’s also been reading the chapters on Power Addiction and surviving a post-Ranger life.”

“Chapters?” Lauren asked.

Jayden passed her the book. “We got this the day after the team formed,” he said. “Fifty-nine chapters of advice. I think that the older teams of Rangers sent it.”

Lauren flipped through the table of contents. “Wow, this is pretty useful,” she said. “But I think we could add a few chapters of our own.”

*

So You Want to Be a Power Ranger?

Table of Contents

CHAPTER ONE: KNOW YOUR RED RANGER.

CHAPTER TWO: DON'T PISS OFF YOUR TECH.

CHAPTER THREE: WHY YOU SHOULD BE SCARED OF THE YELLOW RANGERS

CHAPTER FOUR: YOU'RE ALL IMPORTANT, STOP THINKING YOU'RE NOT

CHAPTER FIVE: HOW TO AVOID THE POWER SCREWING UP YOUR PERSONAL LIFE

CHAPTER SIX: ANGST, AND HOW TO DEAL WITH ANGSTING TEAMMATES

CHAPTER SEVEN: CLONES, SPELLS AND ROBOTS - TOMMY OLIVER'S GUIDE TO MAKING IT THROUGH WITH YOUR SANITY INTACT

CHAPTER EIGHT: DON'T READ THAT PREVIOUS CHAPTER, TOMMY'S NUTS

CHAPTER NINE: HOW TO GET YOUR DOCTORATE IN LIKE, SIX YEARS

CHAPTER TEN: YOUR MENTOR AND YOU: TIMES TO LISTEN, AND TIMES TO IGNORE THEM

CHAPTER ELEVEN: SURVIVING A DAY IN A TEAMMATE'S BODY

CHAPTER TWELVE: WHAT TO DO WHEN THE VILLAIN TURNS OUT TO BE YOUR LONG LOST SIBLING

CHAPTER THIRTEEN: REFORMED VILLAINS, AND WHERE THEY FIT ON THE HIERARCHY

CHAPTER FOURTEEN: COMMUNITY RELATIONS, AND HOW TO APOLOGIZE AFTER BLOWING UP THE CITY FOR THE TWELFTH TIME

CHAPTER FIFTEEN: SECRET IDENTITIES AND YOU

CHAPTER SIXTEEN: NONE OF YOU WILL EVER OUT-EMO ANDROS, SO DON'T EVEN TRY

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN: SURVIVING YOUR SHOPPING DAY WITH KIMBERLY HART

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN: BEING THE ONLY GIRL ON THE TEAM: HOW TO COPE WITH ALL THAT TESTOSTERONE

CHAPTER NINETEEN: ON IMPRACTICAL UNIFORM CHOICES

CHAPTER TWENTY: SIXTH RANGERS. THE CARE AND FEEDING OF.

CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE: SO YOUR RED RANGER RAN OFF? A LIST OF COMMON PLACES TO FIND THEM

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO: SPECIAL POWERS VS MARTIAL ARTS. THE DEBATE CONTINUES

CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE: BATTLIZERS - WHY AND WHO DESIGNS THESE PIECES OF SHIT

CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR: IF ONE OF YOUR TEAMMATES IS A LITTLE WEIRD, THEY WILL SAVE YOUR LIFE AT LEAST ONCE, SO STOP MOCKING THEM

CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE: POWER ADDICTION

CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX: TEAMUPS, AND HOW TO SURVIVE THEM

CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN: YES, THERE'S A REASON YOU HAVE 18 YELLOW BRAS

CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT: CIVILIAN SUPPORT, OR YOUR BOSS IS NOT AS DUMB AS YOU THINK

CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE: EVIL VILLAINS WILL, IN FACT, DO EVIL THINGS.

CHAPTER THIRTY: LAWFUL STUPID IS STILL STUPID

CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE: RED RANGERS AND SPEECHES

CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO: GETTING INTO A FIGHT WITH A FELLOW RANGER WILL ONLY LEAD TO EVIL SPELLS AND GLOWING EYES

CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE: SCIENCE AND YOU: RULES DO NOT APPLY

CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR: ROOKIE REDS: MENACE OR GENIUS?

CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE: ON PLANS AND COMMUNICATION THEREOF

CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX: SPACE DOES NOT WORK THAT WAY

CHAPTER THIRTY-SEVEN: CAPES, YAY OR NAY?

CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT: KNOW YOUR LOCAL GEOGRAPHY: QUARRIES AND YOU

CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE: FACE YOUR FEARS, OR YOUR ENEMIES WILL MAKE YOU DO IT ANYWAY

CHAPTER FORTY: ALTERNATE REALITIES: HOW TO FACE ACCIDENTALLY ENDING THE WORLD

CHAPTER FORTY-ONE: UNEXPECTED CROSSOVERS: WHAT TO DO WITH A WALKING AND TALKING TURTLE

CHAPTER FORTY-TWO: EVIL TWINS AND HOW TO FIGHT YOURSELF

CHAPTER FORTY-THREE: NO, REALLY, SOMEBODY UNDERSTANDS YOUR PAIN. WE PROMISE.

CHAPTER FORTY-FOUR: AMNESIA, MEMORY LOSS, AND BRAINWASHING: PROBLEMS OF THE MIND

CHAPTER FORTY-FIVE: SAVING THE HOLIDAYS AGAIN

CHAPTER FORTY-SIX: IF A NEED FOR A TOMMY ARISES, TOMMY WILL BE THE TOMMY

CHAPTER FORTY-SEVEN: THERE ARE DIFFERENT TYPES OF INTELLIGENCE, JUST BECAUSE YOU AREN'T BILLY, IT DOESN'T MEAN YOU'RE NOT SMART

CHAPTER FORTY-EIGHT: DID YOU REALLY JUST TRUST THE BAD GUYS IN A BARGAIN? REALLY?

CHAPTER FORTY-NINE: SURVIVING A POST-RANGER LIFE. WHY USING A BROKEN MORPHER IS A BAD IDEA

CHAPTER FIFTY: NO, REALLY, WE FUCKING MEAN IT. BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD IDEA, DUDES.

CHAPTER FIFTY-ONE: INAPPROPRIATELY YOUNG FRIENDS: THEY WILL BE KIDNAPPED REPEATEDLY

CHAPTER FIFTY-TWO: YOUR INAPPROPRIATELY YOUNG FRIENDS ARE PROBABLY SMARTER THAN YOU

CHAPTER FIFTY-THREE: DATING YOUR TEAMMATES, WHY OR WHY NOT?

CHAPTER FIFTY-FOUR: NEW STUDENTS, AND HOW THEY WILL SOON BE YOUR TEAMMATES

CHAPTER FIFTY-FIVE: THOSE TWO GUYS WHO KEEP TRYING TO FIND OUT YOUR IDENTITIES WILL SAVE THE DAY IN THE END

CHAPTER FIFTY-SIX: NINJA SCHOOLS: NOT AS SECRET AS YOU THINK THEY ARE

CHAPTER FIFTY-SEVEN: TIME PARADOXES. EVERYTHING YOU DO NOW IS RUINING SOMETHING IN THE FUTURE.

CHAPTER FIFTY-EIGHT: ROBOT BUDDIES. WHY YOU SHOULDN’T ABUSE THEM.

CHAPTER FIFTY-NINE: POWER QUESTS: FISHING AND HIKING AND OTHER THINGS YOU CAN DO WHILE SEARCHING FOR NEW POWERS

CHAPTER SIXTY: LONG LOST RELATIVES: ARE YOU SURE YOU REALLY KNOW YOUR FAMILY?

CHAPTER SIXTY-ONE: STALKER VILLAINS: SOMETIMES, YOU JUST NEED TO DUEL THEM

CHAPTER SIXTY-TWO: AROUND THE WORLD TRIPS: THE BEST WAY TO CELEBRATE DEFEATING A GREAT EVIL

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [So You're a Character In the Storybook](https://archiveofourown.org/works/7203617) by [FrenchRoast](https://archiveofourown.org/users/FrenchRoast/pseuds/FrenchRoast)




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